I finished work early so thought i would pop into the pub at the top of the road for a quick pint before i went home.

Anyhow got in the pub and had a pint of Becks, was just finishing off when my mate Dave walked in and he bought me another pint.

So i thought i would be ok as i only live 500 yards from the pub, anyhow, i get back in my 480 and just as i pull out of the car park i spot a police car behind me, he pulls me over and says to me, "pulled out of that junction a bit quick didn't you??? Been in there drinking have you???"

I replied No.... he says i'm going to breathalise you anyway...

So i thought i would be a bit cocky and said i'm not blowing into that thing I might catch something, he told me i had to or go to the station for a blood or urine test.

So i said im not blowing into that machine, so i got arrested and took down to the police station, when i got there the copper tells the desk sergeant what i'd said and that i wouldn't take a breath test.

So he gave me the options, get a doctor to come and do a blood test or i can do a urine sample.

So i said to be honest i'm scared of needles so can i do the urine test.

So he runs through the procedure and i'm escorted off to the bogs to pee in a jar, i do the test and return to the reception to see the desk sergeant and place the sample in front of him, he starts filling out some paperwork so i think up a plan.

I pick up the sample off the desk and hide it in my pocket, the sergeant asks where the sample has gone and i say the other policeman has just took it away, he wanders off and i'm left stood there....

The desk sergeant comes back clearly not happy saying the other policeman didn't take it away, so then i get strip searched and end up being charged with Taking The Piss instead of Drink Driving ....
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